On Rushing to Work

I think of my grandfather every morning on my way to work. This isn’t a rant about how much I dislike my job (even though I do), but it’s important to note I’m always rushing to get to work on time. It doesn’t matter if I wake up 2 hours before I must leave, I’m still always rushing to get there. This involves a lot of speeding, some clever maneuvering, and frequently driving through yellow lights. It also involves a lot of luck and the occasional willingness of my boss to look the other way when I stroll in at 802.

So what does this have to do with Papa? One of his many Papa-isms (his wise words of wisdom pretty enough for a coffee mug) was: A failure to plan on your part does not constitute a crisis on my part. And boy was he right about that.

This morning in particular, I was in the left hand lane behind two cars who insisted on going the speed limit. I was going to pass on the right, but I couldn’t because there was another car also going the speed limit. I started to get upset and then I reconsidered. My failure to plan to leave on time was not a crisis for the cars in front of me. They had probably left on time. Or they were heading to a destination that didn’t have a strict start time.

I can’t say I didn’t utter a swear word or 20 as I finally got an opening to get around the slow-pokes, but it really got me thinking. How often do we blame others for things that are entirely (or mostly) our fault? I know I do it all the time. Pretty much every morning on my commute to work, but also several times during the day. I find myself unwilling to take responsibility for things that go awry. I think this is typical of most people, especially when you have a plan and life intervenes.

Papa had another saying, “A failure to plan is a plan to fail.” In my first blog post, I laid out numerous plans I had for this new year. Only 20 days in, I can say I’m doing ok. Not great, but ok. I’ve made some great improvements, but I’ve still fallen short of where I want to be. I’ve done well with my writing. I started off strong with taking my medication, but I’ve gone several days without now. I’ve improved my eating habits, but I’m still missing the mark. I’ve been reading a ton, but I’m so focused on finishing the Boxcar Children series that I haven’t read anything else. I’ve also improved with political activity. I’ve sent out 15 postcards to voters in Florida and I’ve been texting with both the Pete for America campaign and the Warren for President campaign, sending out over 500 texts so far. I plan to set more goals, but I need to focus on these first.

So what does all this mean? I have no idea. Papa was always big on plans. Maybe that’s why I’m so focused on it this year. He was a fan of plans and lists (a genetic trait, based on my mom and sisters behaviors). Maybe I just don’t want to look back some day and regret not doing all the things I wanted to do. I’ve made my plans. I’m working on my plans. Maybe I’ll fail, maybe I won’t. But I’ve made these plans to make myself better and to accomplish the things I always said I’d do “one day.” Maybe I should have included a plan to leave earlier for work….